Embracing Your Natural Look

This Tuesday we have the amazing Ruth from Just Rambling…

First off, thanks so much, Jenna, for allowing me to write a post for your blog! I truly enjoy reading your posts and think you are a great writer! Keep it up, you rock!

Black hair… As I read magazines, watch television or look at random people walking on the streets, I wonder, ‘what the heck is wrong with black hair?’ When I say ‘black hair’ I am certainly not talking about the color black. Although black hair is usually black, duh, it isn’t always black. See, my hair is referred to as ‘black hair’ too, but it’s actually brown. So when I say black hair, I’m referring to afro-textured hair predominantly found in the Black portion of the world’s population.

Growing up in a white community I soon found out that my hair was different.
I learned that my hair had specific needs. I couldn’t just go to a hairdresser that was only used to cutting the silky, straight and smooth hair of my friends. I couldn’t just go to the nearest store and buy the same hairspray my friends used.
My hair would freak out and yell at me if I did that.

I learned to be happy with my hair. Yeah, maybe I had to drive a few hours to find a good hairdresser and yeah, maybe I had to pay a little extra for that special hairspray, but I couldn’t be bothered by it.
As I read magazines and see Beyoncé’s various hairdo’s, I think, ‘Girl, show me your real hair. Show me your natural black hair.’ I’m sorry to see so many black celebrities like Beyoncé and Rihanna wear weaves and wigs all the time. Oh, Tyra Banks?
Don’t even get me started on Tyra Banks.
They are black, but it’s like they’re trying to walk around with their hair looking as Caucasian as possible.

And then there are tons of black people who do chemical treatments for their hair.
They relax their hair. Relaxing your hair is more than telling your hair to chill and not worry about rain or anything. It’s a chemical treatment to straighten your hair.
You do it to get rid of your nappy hair. If you don’t apply the cream right, your hair is going to break or it’ll burn your scalp. Nasty.
There’s nothing wrong with relaxing your hair, but all I’m wondering is why in the world are so many black chicks willing to weary their hair with dangerous chemical treatments just to make it look like white chick hair?
All of them want their hair to dance in the wind.
Yeah, I know there are many white celebrities wearing extensions too, but it seems as if many black people are scared to embrace their natural look.
Just one day in Amsterdam, I get to count hundreds of black people walking around with relaxed hair, wearing weaves, wigs, etc. They had anything but their real hair.
And don’t get me wrong, I love “good hair”. I don’t have it, but I love it. But this is all about being happy with what God gave you.

Let me tell you a little bit of my own story.
One day I woke up and thought that I had a great idea. I was going to perm my hair.
I called the special black hair hairdresser and made an appointment. I drove 2 boring hours to get my hair done. I went in with straight hair and left that day with super cool happy and curly hair. The next day I noticed my face was a little bit red, nothing to be alarmed about, but I did think it was odd.
As the days went by, I noticed red rash on my face. Since I really don’t like going to the doctor, it took me ages to realize that I really had to go. It got worse and worse so I went to the doctor. He gave me something, but it didn’t help, in fact the rash got worse. Crap.
At one point the skin on my face hurt so flipping bad and it burned. It felt as if my face was on fire. I couldn’t touch my face or smile because it burned like hell.
When I couldn’t take it anymore I hurried to the doctor one night. The doctor looked at me and said, ‘aw, no way, you must be in so much pain now!’. But she couldn’t give me anything.
I was desperate. Here I was, my face was full of red rash, it burned, it hurt like hell and no one was able to help me. The next morning I didn’t give up and hurried to the doctor again. This time it was a different doctor. He saw my face, winced and gave me burn ointment. I wasn’t allowed to use it for more than 1 week because of all the hormones in it.
After a week I went back, no change. My skin didn’t hurt as bad anymore, but it was still really, really bad. The doctor didn’t know what to do anymore and sent me to the hospital. Apparently my case was so rare that the physician had to take pictures so he could discuss it with other physicians. They did a biopsy to examine my skin.
They couldn’t find what was wrong and I was left desperate without any hope my face would heal.
After a few appointments he gave me a special ointment he made.
All I knew for sure was that it had to do with my perm treatment. I was very angry at myself. Why couldn’t I stay the way I was? Why did I have to do the chemical, nasty treatment? I was stupid. I shouldn’t have done it. But I know it’s all very easy to say that with hindsight.
The ointment caused my skin to peel off and within a few months I had new skin.
The physician explained that my new skin was sensitive like baby skin and couldn’t be exposed to sun for a while. I couldn’t really care, I was OK, and my skin was super clean and soft as a baby.

I know all of this doesn’t happen a lot, I know so many people who did the same perm treatment and nothing happened. It was just bad luck. But it left me wondering, really… why relax your hair if it’s so dangerous? Why perm your hair? Why wear weaves and wigs? Why go through all this trouble just to walk around with “good hair”? Why not embrace your natural look, be happy with that and let your hair relax for real by NOT treating it chemically?

I know this is kind of an anti-climax, but I still relax my hair every now and then.
Not as often as I used to, but I still do it. Perm my hair? No. No, never, ever, ever. Not in a bazillion years. Not for a bazillion billion dollars.
One day I hope I will have enough courage to stay away from hair relaxers. One day I hope I will have enough courage to fully embrace my natural look.

All I can say is, ‘yay Lauryn Hill!’. She did it and you know what, the natural black hair look is beautiful!


Love About Me

Google Image30 days of Truth is about bringing out the best in yourself. Also, to let people see the “real” you through what you write. For thirty days I will write about myself, I will dig deep and I hope you can start this journey with me. 30 days of Truth; Are you ready!?

Day 02
Something Some things you love about yourself
Outgoing Personality
Blue (Changing) Eyes
Hair Color
I love the fact that I can be burned, walked on, people telling lies about me and I still have the strength to rise above them. I love the fact that I will always love other people and give them the chance at getting close to me, without pushing them off, even if I have been through enough pain and suffering.
Also, I love the fact that I can laugh when I want to, smile enough to make others smile, and be there for my friends when they need me.
I will also be there for everyone; family, friends, or people in between. I will be there for my daughter, I will tell her I love her everyday, I will show her how to love herself, and for that I will love myself. I am a “real” woman. I will do things that people may not agree with, but I am “me”. I may not vote, or become the next president, but I will love with everything I got, and I will not back down.

“Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away. For we know in part and we prophesy in part, but when perfection comes, the imperfect disappears. When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put childish ways behind me. Now we see but a poor reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known. And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.” (John 3:16)

What do you love about yourself?

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Nothing like a great Tuesday.

Waking up feeling refreshed, ready to go, and to start your day off by exercising is always a plus. Looking in the mirror while you are straightening your hair, realizing your old self is coming back to life, you smile at your reflection knowing you are beautiful, inside and out. Now you just wish everyone else is having a great day like you are.

May everyone have a wonderful Tuesday!! Here is a song that I thought about today.

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